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Peyton Manning goes to Denver. Two years ago the Broncos traded up in the first round to draft the guy, then he exceeded all expectations and he is only worth a fourth round pick? I’m sure he’s a swell guy. It’s everyone else who are fucking annoying, pretending that because he likes Jesus, Tebow is somehow an important sports figure. He went from one of the worst starting quarterbacks to an ok backup

Chipper Jones will retire after this year. The fifth best thirdbaseman in baseball history and an automatic first ballot Hall-of-Famer. The sixth best thirdbaseman had to wait 28 years after he retired and one year after he died to make it to the Hall-of-Fame. Of the 120 or so people put into the Hall-of-Fame by the Veterans Committee, Ron Santo was better than all but two of them. Anyone who uses Veterans Committee selections to argue why a similar player deserves to be inducted by the Writers is a fucking idiot with their head shoved up their ass. The fact that they weren’t chosen by the Writers proves that they were below their standards

NCAA Tournament. Everyone tries to guess the winners of each game of the “bracket.” If anyone was truly bright enough to pick winners at a better rate than the crowd, they would have already won millions betting on sports. I know absolutely nothing about any of the teams, simply picked whichever team was the favorite to win each game and those choices are doing better than 81% of submissions on ESPN.com. If Kentucky beats Ohio State, it will end up doing better than 90%. And I’ll do the same thing next year. And I’ll be willing to wager $100 against anyone else’s choices (if that’s not enough for you, how about $10 000? If you haven’t yet earned your millions betting on these games, my picks will always be much more likely to win than yours — and I’m willing to back it up with however much money you want)

Olympic year. Americans against the communists. America has a better than 50% chance of winning the most Gold Medals. Communist China has a better than 40% chance. China may have a huge advantage in population, but America has a huge advantage in spending money on sports. Adjust for population and money and Communist Cuba is the best sports country in the world. Russia went from the very best to a very distant third when they gave up on it. Every other country in the Eastern Bloc dropped off. Germany from near the top to merely decent. Romania, Bulgaria and Poland went from middle of the pack to not very many in Olympic medals. It may not be holding up very well, but communism proved itself long ago the best system for building sports talent

Saints lose draft picks and have major suspensions on their coaching staff. All because they thought their workers deserved to be paid for the work they did. The job description for any pro athlete is to help the team win. In football that means hitting the guy. Hitting him so hard brains bounce around inside the skill. Joints are pounded by thousands of pounds of force until they lose function. NFL players die young. They deserve to be compensated. And they are. Every time any team gives any player his paycheck, they are paying him because of how effective he is at wrecking the health of the guy on the other team

Tiger Woods first PGA win since 2009 last weekend. He went nearly three years without a win and was still earning $75 million per year

Top 10 thirdbaseman
1 Mike Schmidt
2 Eddie Mathews
3 George Brett
4 Wade Boggs
5 Jones
6 Santo
7 Brooks Robinson
8 Darrell Evans
9 Home Run Baker
10 Scott Rolen

side note: two best DHs in history played more games at thirdbase than anywhere else in the field, Paul Molitor and Edgar Martinez

side note II: the only Cuban born player in the Hall-of-Fame wouldn’t even make the Cuban born All-Star team. Tony Perez should have used drugs if he wanted to be better than Rafael Palerio. Cuban born Minnie Minoso is only the second best leftfielder not in the Hall-of-Fame, but Tim Raines, like Palmerio, was another drug user, so he can’t be allowed in. Putting drug users in the Hall-of-Fame means losing the war on drugs. Luis Tiant doesn’t deserve to be in, not because of drugs, but because he just wasn’t good enough. Yet still far better than Jack Morris, who still has so many fucking idiots thinking he would be a reasonable choice